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  • Beyond the Valley of the Dolls

    Beyond the Valley of the Dolls


    "Ere this night does wane, you will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!"

    What on Earth, Roger Ebert, you weird fucker!?! People can think of him as their favorite film critic of all time but I will always think of you as the screenwriter for this film.

    Beyond the Valley of the Dolls is in my Top 10 films of all time. And, really, can you blame me? Directed by tit master, Russ Meyer, this film has absolutely everything…

  • Island of Death

    Island of Death


    One of the more insane movies I've seen and that is sayin' something.

    Me: Uh, what is going on with that goat?
    Eric: Hahah. That would be funny if he started fucking that goat.
    Me: Uhh.
    Eric: Is he going to fuck that goat?! He IS going to fuck that goat. He is fucking that goat!


    Me: Uh, what's that guy up to?
    Eric: Hahah, wouldn't that be funny if he pissed in her mouth?
    Me: Uhh.
    Eric: Is…

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  • Battle Royale

    Battle Royale


    Every boy in this movie looks like he is a character straight from anime. Man, I hate that hairstyle. Then and now.

    Suzanne Collins (The Hunger Games) says she was inspired to write The Hunger Games after the poverty she saw in Iraq during the war. Uh huh.

    Is anyone else buying that bullshit?

    Still a great movie 14 years later.

  • Everybody Wants Some!!

    Everybody Wants Some!!


    My original review of this was very short because, although I enjoyed the film, I didn't think it warranted any kind of lengthy write-up. I still don't think it does, really but based on everything that has been said about it over the past two months I just wanted to say a few words on how I viewed it.

    I enjoyed the movie for what it was; a movie about college male baseball players in 1980. Period. Linklater WAS a…