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  • Pink Floyd - The Wall

    Pink Floyd - The Wall

    ★★★★½

    I waited a long time to watch this with the right person. I knew I was going to love it - I've been a massive fan of Pink Floyd for ages - but I wanted to share it with someone who would really get it.

    When I mentioned to my wife that I hadn't seen it yet (despite having owned the DVD since long before I met her), she immediately turned off the lights and urged me to put in…

  • Highlander

    Highlander

    ★★★★

    The immortal Connor MacLeod (Luke Skywalker) begins life as a normal chap in 16th century Scotland, but is cast out of his village under suspicion of devilry when he miraculously recovers from an obviously fatal battle wound.

    Sean Connery stars as Ramiraz (Ben Kenobe), and trains the young highlander (Jedi) in the art of swordplay and use of The Quickening (The Force).

    A tall warrior in black with a breathing problem (caused by an injury sustained in battle with Ramiraz),…

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  • Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

    Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

    Technically okay but just devoid of any emotion or charisma. The 1971 version was flawed but far superior to this mechanical, featureless mess. 

    Terrible. Avoid.

  • Going in Style

    Going in Style

    ★★★½

    Very gentle and quite kind-hearted. Some old guys are getting a rough deal, losing their pension, so they decide to rob a bank. Peacefully.

    It Michael Caine, Alan Arkin and Morgan Freeman so you’re going to be okay, but don’t expect any doors to be blown off. These guys are in their 80s. 

    I like films where guys are friends and they’re kind to each other. It’s nice. Even if the plot is silly.

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  • The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

    The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

    Terry Gilliam always makes shit movies.

    He made this movie.

    It's shit.

  • The Man Who Fell to Earth

    The Man Who Fell to Earth

    A strange film about an alien, disguised as a youthful and thin David Bowie, who comes to Earth for a drink of water (wtf?). He becomes a wealthy tycoon by selling silver rings for $20 (wtf?). He longs to get home to his family, but a dream sequence seems to indicate that they've most likely died of dehydration. Nevertheless, he bootstraps a private space program so he can return to his home planet now that he's had his glass of…