This is a designer handbag full of vomit.
It looks great (I love the vibrant warm colors), it's shot well, the cast is talented but the story...is a convoluted mess. You cannot simply suspend your disbelief to make this plot work--you need to shoot that baby into space. I had so many eye-roll moments watching this, it probably looked like I was having a seizure.
Neil Jordan, how could you do us so wrong?