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  • Chef

    Chef

    This film was recommended to me by a young man working concessions at a local cineplex. I did not know it was an internet meme until after having watched it, but when I returned to declare it "the Citizen Kane of culinary films," the popcorn peddler cocked his eyebrow and said "Well, I don't know about all that."

    This marks the only time in my life I have been doublememed and from that day on I decided never to do, say, or even think anything ironically ever again. I strongly encourage you to do the same lest you suffer a similar fate.

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  • 8½

    ★★★★★

    When it comes down to it, this and Chef by Jon Favreau are the only two movies, because there are only two types of people in the world and one compares film and filmmaking to sex and the other compares them to food and cooking.

    Of course one day the thesis and antithesis will synthesize and every movie will be 9 1/2 Weeks.

  • The Hunger Games

    The Hunger Games

    ½

    I can't afford to think like that.

    It's difficult to critique without having seen the entire franchise, but The Hunger Games still feels incredibly confused to me. It's virtually a pornographic disempowerment fantasy a la Twilight, where every man either likes Katniss or wants to kill her, but then none of them are Edward Cullen-levels of beautiful and want to do both. It's ostensibly about how people who disregard the sanctity of life are intrinsically evil, but then neglects to…

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  • Interstellar

    Interstellar

    ½

    Kubrick: The drives that generate violence among men will someday slingshot us to a higher evolutionary plane where we may or may not transcend them, if we can first abort the rival ascent of artificial life.

    Tarkovsky: Technology makes real what we want, but it cannot make what we want significant; and perhaps being shown what we want, divorced from meaning, will only drive us further into our own psychological prisons.

    Nolan: Alright gang, tech's put us in a bit of a bind, but to save the world, we're gonna have to travel faster than the speed of love.

  • Us

    Us

    The most compelling difference between horror movies and thrillers for me isn't just that thrillers provide explanations where horror films do not, it's that the ideal explanations in horror, should they be called for, make everything less sensible and even more horrific, as they abide only by the logic of nightmares. Where Get Out sort of rested on the razor's edge between the two genres and used social satire as a binding agent, Us is a proper horror movie. My…